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"I Can't Do That."

How many times have you said this to yourself in the past week? In the past year?

It's easy to feel intimidated by the number of tasks, goals, and accomplishments that are new to you when you've just left college or you are taking your first steps into a brand-new career field. But if "I can't do that" has become your personal mantra, it's time to tip the scales in favor of self-confidence. Here's how:

  1. Get out there and learn new skills -- or improve on old ones.
    Getting better at something is a great way to build confidence. Start by identifying your strengths. What types of new projects do you fight for free time in order to launch? When you work on a team or group, which jobs do you pounce on to claim for yourself?

    These don't have to be work-specific; the time you spend developing any skill will pay off in increased self-confidence, perseverance, and ability. If you've always wanted to grow perfect tomatoes, climb a rock wall, or master some great dance moves, now is the time to start!
  2. See mistakes as reasons to learn, not reasons to quit.
    The famous writer and illustrator Theodore Seuss Geisel, also known as "Dr. Seuss," never threw away a single rejection letter. Instead, he covered the wall of his office with them -- and used them as motivation to create better work each time he sat down to write or draw.

    Demanding perfection of yourself in any task is not only a great way to kill your motivation, it's also a great way to decimate your self-confidence. Instead, see every mistake as a chance to learn something. Become an expert at making every mistake once, but never making the same mistake twice.
  3. Set SMART goals and track the results.
    Self-confidence thrives when you can see the progress you're making. In order to help keep track of your accomplishments, set goals that are "SMART": Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Timely. Your goals may relate to personal accomplishments you want to achieve, or they can focus on goals like finding a new job. For example, while "network" is a large, vague goal, "meet two professional contacts this week for coffee" is a goal you'll know whether or not you've met -- and your confidence will expand when you do.

    Many parents keep scrapbooks of their children's first victories: first words, first steps, first day of school. Parents do this when they're bursting with so much pride and confidence in their children that they have to write it down. You can be your own "proud parent" by keeping a list of your own victories. When you've met your two contacts for coffee this week (for instance), write it down. If you're really motivated, make a game of it -- after reaching a significant goal, reward yourself.
  4. In a pinch, go for "instant self-confidence."
    Tackling a new task or overhauling your goal system is a great self-confidence booster, but it's not an option when you need more confidence fast. When you're sitting in an interview waiting room or need to give yourself a "pep talk" to pick up the phone, try these "instant self-confidence" boosters:

    1. Smile. Smiling triggers the brain to release the same endorphins it does when you're actually happy. It also makes other people feel friendlier toward you.
    2. Give yourself a standard to reach. Controlling other people's expectations is impossible. Instead, decide what your goal is for the task ahead. You're in control over whether or not you meet it, which boosts confidence whether or not you succeed.
    3. Look ahead. What is the next small step you can take toward your goal? Take it.
  5. Teach yourself a new language.
    But don't make it a foreign language. As exciting as it would be to head overseas speaking like a local, the first "new language" to learn in order to supercharge your self-confidence is the language you use when you speak to yourself. Start paying attention to the moments when your brain says things like "I can't do that," "I'm hopeless," or "I'll never get this right." Stop them in their tracks and replace them with more constructive thoughts that you can believe now: "I can figure this out," "I've already learned more than I knew this morning," or "I won't make that mistake again."